update

I feel like my blog has potential. I realize that if I don't post things here, no one will. And I'd really like to have a little history here ... so I promise to make an effort to be more diligent in my blogging. I don't promise to be perfect.

Things going on in our life:
WEEK 37
That's right -- FULL TERM. My little babe is ready for the world ... according to the internet, her lungs are developed and she's the size of an actual baby. It's blowing my mind. I flip back and forth between wanting to have her and not being ready ... we're ready ... I just don't know if I'm ready to share her with the rest of the world. She's so safe and cozy in there, we're having the best time together. But then I think of Lucas holding her and tear up (I'm pretty high on the emotional scale). I'm so excited to see him be a dad.

CHRISTMAS
Christmas was awesome. We had the day off from proctor kids (always a treat), so we slept in and had a low-key morning together. Great gifts were exchanged, Lucas really spoiled me. I'm a lucky gal. In the afternoon we saw Django Unchained with my brothers ... what a treat. Maybe I shouldn't, but I just love Quentin Tarantino. And the soundtrack is incredible also.

Really that's all that's going on in our life. Our boys are on Trek this week (!) so we're thinking about a little weekend getaway ... any suggestions?

Check out this blog -- Jill Outside -- and tell me it doesn't make you want to run a 50 mile race. I can't wait until I can run again ....

And, my favorite song lately:

night links

My graveyards at PG are generally quiet and boring, and a great opportunity to catch up on my blogs. Here's what I found tonight ... some giveaways!

First up: 3 sets of Stickygrams, from Rockstar Diaries. We have one set already, and I love them. They're the perfect little magnets for your fridge or wherever ... from your Instagram pictures! Genius.

Next, Christmas cards from Minted! The Dear Baby blog is one of my favorites, and she's giving away a $75 credit to Minted ... awesome! (I may have spent at least 45 minutes looking for the perfect holiday card tonight).

Third - for moms, or anyone interested in a stroller .... Pink Pistachio is giving away a $400 Snugli stroller!

And ... if you Instagram, you should follow Freshly Picked. If you re-post a moccasin picture from her Insta, you could win a pair! Click here for a look, you'll die. They're the cutest things ever.

Are you kidding me?

And ... just for fun, a couple of Brok helping me wash the sheets tonight. I love him.

Wednesday

Just a few things.
First, my friend Ashlee pointed this out on Instagram:

Thank you, Walgreens.

Next, please please please someone buy these for my (sure to be) darling daughter. She needs them:

link.
I don't care what anyone says, I love Christmas music. I started listening, and so far I can't get enough of this:

I plan on watching the movie this week also.

A great reminder to serve, from M. Russell Ballard ("Be Anxiously Engaged")
"Great things are brought about and burdens are lightened through the efforts of many hands 'anxiously engaged in a good cause.' Imagine what the millions of Latter-day Saints could accomplish in the world if we functioned like a beehive in our focused, concentrated commitment to the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ."

Anyone fancy a trip to H & M? I want this:

Hope you have a great Wednesday!

I don't have much to say.

Sometimes I feel like we have a lot going on, but I really don't have anything to blog about. Current highlights:

**working on the nursery -- any thoughts on adding a chair rail? maybe a little wainscoting? Lucas is going to town refinishing all of the furniture, and we're painting this week.
**Lucas got a promotion at work. It's pretty exciting. He's working with the same kids (proctor care, substance abuse program), and really loves it. Plus, he's awesome at it.
**We spent the day in Park City this weekend, got Lucas the most awesome boots in the world: THESE, but with a black sole. They're incredible. And spent a bunch of money on baby girl items (mostly clearance!). We're really getting excited.
**Speaking of pregnancy, I'm officially in the 3rd trimester! Baby girl is the size of a Chinese Cabbage:

... and I'm feeling huge, but really great.

Here are some random things from the internet:

THIS is a really great thought. Thanks L Tom.

A really great post from one of my favorite blogs. I almost cried.

10 great Halloween books from Design Mom.

Have you seen the rendering of the Fort Collins, CO temple? It's different, and so so pretty. Road trip in the future hopefully.


Lastly, why can't I just do this??

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Halloween

Well Halloween is coming ... it's on a Wednesday, so I doubt we'll do anything. Wait, we don't do anything since we've had proctor kids. This particular holiday is a huge trigger for these kids (generally), so we usually just end up hanging out at home. I'm totally okay with this, btw. I really like hanging out at home, especially if I can hang out there with Lucas and watch a scary movie on the couch.* Add a huge bowl of assorted chocolate to that mix and I'm sold.

So maybe I spent half of my shift looking at pictures of dog Halloween costumes tonight. Here are some of my favorites ... please vote.

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*Remember back in the old days of dating when you loved watching scary movies on the couch with a boy so you could act all scared and cuddle up real close to him? I'm totally doing that on Halloween.

conference weekend!

Can't wait.

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Some links for you

A Side-by-Side Comparison of the 2012 Democratic and Republic Party Platform Documents

Missing Google maps on your iphone since the iOS udpate?

I want pretty much everything from here ... especially this.

My new favorite time-waster ... and it makes me feel smart.

A really great gift idea website.

My case is starting to fall apart ... but I'd be happy with any one of these.

Awesome pics from the National Geographic photo contest.

My new favorite pinterest page - Baby DIY.

October is National Down Syndrome month! Hopefully you know someone with Down Syndrome you can hug this month :)

Porn for pregnant ladies. Oh yeah.

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excitement. anticipation.

I want to write a post that expresses how excited I am for the next few months. I don't know how to put into words the way I feel right now, but I don't want to forget it.

This is my third pregnancy. The first ended early, before I really realized what was happening. Although it was early, it knocked me over emotionally. I didn't realize it could hurt so badly to lose something you never really had.
Pregnancy #2 was ... rough. We lost the twins at 21 weeks, in a foreign land (Indiana), right before Christmas last year. I don't wish this kind of pain on my worst enemy. I don't really like to talk about it.

This pregnancy has had me somewhat anxious. I've had ultrasounds every 2 weeks to measure my cervix, and in the beginning every single twinge of pain or anything threw me into a momentary panic. Luckily, I have a super fantastic husband who makes me relax all the time, cooks me dinners, gives me blessings, and puts up with vetoes my baby name ideas.
This pregnancy is exciting. I'm 24 weeks today, and it's finally starting to feel real. I can't wait to meet the little peanut. But, I really love being pregnant too. I secretly love wearing maternity clothes, and it hasn't even bothered me yet when people touch my belly. Yet. The best thing is feeling her move around in there. I felt the twins move a bunch, but not like this. I'm totally in awe of this little tiny person in there, moving around, taking naps when she wants, I love it. I sometimes just stare at my stomach, watching it move when she does. It blows my mind to think that it's not just hiccups or something ... it's an actual person in there. I love this time I get with her, just the two of us for a little while.

I'm just so thankful.

texts out of context: part 2.

So here it is: version 2.
See version 1 here, and my inspiration here. Enjoy.

*Drug tests and relapses. How did you sleep?

*WTH? What's with the horse head and twin dancers?

*Tyler has been up banging on sh*t since 4. I've been up since 4.

*There is a pack of coyotes howling right now.

*Potassium.
*(1 minute later) That is K on the periodic table.

*... and this gross lady in buckskins.

*Date with the nibbler is over. He kind of grew on me.

*You are missing a horrible windstorm.

*Yes. Ron. Swanson.

*Crap on a stick.

*I may or may not be using your trifle dish to make the trifle recipe I stole from your pinterest to make a dessert from a bridal shower I'm hosting.

*Clothing would be my vote.

*Pretty much pure hell.

*Oh man!! I'm am so stupid!!

*No I'm not fat .... I'm pregnant.

*I did and I regret it and I threw up in my mouth.

*Yeah. Hope that 60K in debt was worth it.

*Sweet Dee is the king of the world.
*(2 minutes later) Or queen.

*I am just naturally fat :)

*I know, which I find puzzling because she seems so normal.

*So he texted me and wanted to know how my date was. He sucks.

*Do you think he will freak out on a giant flat wakeboarding tube floating down the provo? It's really big.

*But a lion tamer gets to not only be in charge of lions but also gets to have a whip and wear leather!

*Sounds like the dumbass runs in the family.

*If you see him, kick him in the balls for me.

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And ... another plug for my darling niece Soph -- please donate! They are getting so close to their goal - click here.

THANKS!

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I'm thinking about driving to Idaho for scratch-off lotto tickets this weekend if anyone is interested ....

Sweet Sophia

Look how adorable my little niece is:

She's just the sweetest thing too ...

Anyway, her family is participating in the Michiana Down Syndrome Walk this year, where they have a chance to help raise money to assist individuals with Down Syndrome.

CLICK HERE TO CHECK OUT THE FUNDRAISER PAGE AND
*MAKE A DONATION*

thanks!!

another sunday

I love Sundays. I've been working a lot of Sundays lately ... which is quiet and nice and gives me time to watch old 30 Rock episodes ... but I hate missing church. I really hate when Lucas rubs in how awesome the speakers were in Sacrament Meeting, or how great his lesson went in Elder's Quorum. I hate missing out on seeing my church friends. I hate that people need help from the police and rides to the hospital even on Sundays.

So today I've been working on my lesson for Relief Society next week: Stay on the Lord's Side of the Line - #18 from the George Albert Smith manual. Has anyone had this lesson already? Or read it? Any thoughts?

Also, it's Sunday dinner at my mom's house tonight ... we'll be celebrating a couple of birthdays with a delicious cheesecake, but I really really want to make these cookies also:

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And, today I found this fun new blog to read: Flower Patch Farmgirl. I just love finding new blogs to stalk ...

I really love Liz Lemon.



Mostly for Julie, here are a couple of shots of the growing girl (feel free to ignore Pat in the background):

ummm... hello?

I think I need this. I mean, I have a lot of graveyard shift time on my hands to scour the internet for baby products, and I've found a lot of cool stuff .... but this.

From the 4moms website:
The Origami is the world’s first power-folding stroller: at the touch of a button, it folds itself. It’s also the world’s first cell phone-charging, mileage-counting, LCD-sporting stroller, with generators in the rear wheels that charge the stroller as you walk. Plus, the Origami has daytime running lights, pathway lights for low-light conditions, and sensors that detect when a child’s in the seat (so it’ll never fold by accident). From power folding to cell phone charging, it’s everything a stroller should be.
Oh really, I can just charge my cell phone while on a walk? Cool.

PS It's nearly a thousand dollars after all the accessories you have to buy to make it worth it. Ha. Sorry we're not those people that buy $1000 strollers.

But I actually do want this:

Same company, but this is only $299.....

Just for fun, here are some more things that are out of my kid's price range:

Heart Dress

Ursa the Bear

Pink skinny cords

Owl Fiesta (even at 5-pieces, not worth it)

Sleepytime Rocker

a bunch of random

Here are a bunch of fun things from the internet:

Anyone want to go to this calligraphy workshop with me? It's Saturday in Draper.

A couple of things I want from Sephora: eyeshadow & eyeshadow & lotion in my very favorite scent.

How cute is this diaper bag? Any diaper bag recommendations? I'm a tad overwhelmed by the choices out there ...

Punchfork - my new favorite recipe website.

Nymbler - the personal baby name assistant ... we're still taking suggestions :)

You're kidding me with these, right?

If I had a million dollars, I would buy everything from this store for baby girl.

Read this blog. It might make you cry a little, but it's an awesome story from a very brave girl (she lives in my ward and is incredible!)

Listen to this, it's hilarious.

My favorite new blog - Little Band of Brothers

On Empathy & Apathy - good little article

And maybe I've watched this commercial a hundred times. I die laughing every time.

PRAYER WORKS

*Thanks to my favorite ever seminary teacher, Bro Johnson for the title and for helping me build a strong testimony of prayer.

I know I haven't been very open about this pregnancy, but I feel like it's important to talk about the last week or so ...
We went in at 18 weeks for an ultrasound (no biggie, I have them every 2 weeks), checked out the sex - GIRL! - and did the usual vag check of the cervix. Dr Bean got kind of quiet and said there's a little tiny bit of bad news, that he could see a triangle shape (looked like a shadow), and said it could be funneling. Cervical funneling is what happened last time with the twins, at about the same time. It's basically a sign of an incompetent cervix and can lead to early dilation and premature birth. BUT, this shadow could also just be the way the baby was positioned. He wanted us to come in a week later (rather than our usual 2), and to take it easy that week. He also said he wasn't worried, just a tiny bit concerned.

I expected a pretty rough week, sleepless nights, and panic every time I felt anything unusual. But after talking it through with Lucas, we realized that we have zero control here. There is nothing I can do to strengthen my cervix, nothing I can really do to keep it from funneling if it wants to. We realized that it's all up to our Heavenly Father. So ... I got a wonderful Priesthood Blessing from Lucas, went to the temple, and we prayed our guts out all week (thanks to everyone who prayed for me also!).

I love knowing that my Heavenly Father is aware of me and loves me. I loving knowing that He is excited that we are becoming parents and having a family. I love knowing that He is happy to send me a baby girl to take care of. He blessed me that I would feel peace throughout the week and the pregnancy as we deal with these issues. And even though it's hard to hear, I love knowing that He will help us through the trials we will have to endure in the future. I am so grateful for the Priesthood and the opportunity to have blessings whenever I need them thanks to a wonderful husband who honors this great power.

I decided that even if I ended up on bed rest until January, I would be okay with it.

The week went by very smoothly, I didn't worry hardly at all, and we had another appointment at 19 weeks. Heartbeat sounded awesome, the little shady triangle was gone. My cervix is still measuring perfectly average and things are looking great with the baby. We are so grateful that I can continue the pregnancy normally, and so so so grateful to get to bring this little gal into the world.

baby girl

I might have ordered this from etsy today:

(the headband, not the baby)

If you haven't heard, I'm knocked up. Today we found out it's a baby girl, and we're pretty freakin excited.

I had been dreaming about a boy and hoping for a boy all along, but the last couple of weeks all I could think about was girl stuff. Girly outfits and tiny bracelets, girly everything.

Lucas and I couldn't be happier.

The only bad news: we have a list of about a hundred boy names, but zilch on girls. This website, babynamewizard, has been helpful (and fun and addicting) ... but maybe you have some ideas?

PS One more thing - if you get a chance, will you say a little prayer for my cervix? It needs to stay closed and even though it looks great now, it's my greatest cause of stress. Thanks guys.

PPS For those who aren't aware: I'm at 18 weeks, due January 15th, it's a girl. We're dying of excitement.

(17 weeks. I hate taking pictures of myself.)

If you really knew me

If you really knew me, you would know:

- I love the hot hot weather, but not the beach.

- I lucked out with Lucas, he's a way better person than I am.

- I love my dog like my own child.

- I love to work. I feel lazy if I have less than 3 jobs at a time.

- I think black licorice is the best thing in the world, ever. Specifically Good & Plentys.

- I'm really scared to have a daughter. Please please please let me have all boys ... I just wouldn't know what to do with a little gal.

- I don't love swimming. Unless it's in a lake or pond. No pools, no chlorine.

- I with I had more freckles on my nose.

- I sleep through most movies. Home on the couch, in the theater, doesn't matter.

Wasn't that fun? Inspiration from this fun blog I've been reading lately ...

And lovely quote to finish things off:

“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” ― Dr. Seuss

Pioneer Day (yesterday)

"Each of us has a heritage—whether from pioneer forebears, later converts, or others who helped shape our lives. This heritage provides a foundation built of sacrifice and faith. Ours is the privilege and responsibility to build on such firm and stable footings." —Thomas S. Monson

(picture stolen from my talented photographer friend, Vicki, from her recent pioneer trek)

Thanks Julie for making me obsessed with these guys.

a ring

So once upon a time, Lucas had a really sweet wedding band. It was super thick and just his style and awesome ... then one day it was gone. Missing. Suspiciously. Never to be seen again.
Point is, he needs a new one. We've been shopping around (mostly on etsy, they have the best ones), but haven't come to a conclusion. We really like both of these:

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Personally, I feel like the first one is not really wedding band material ... but he is from Michigan .... I just really love the thickness of the second one. They can make it 15mm thick!

Any thoughts? Maybe we should just get both?

on my mind

Don't you hate it when you're trying to do something really nice for someone else, who needs help? And someone else tries to make you feel stupid or tells you you're doing the wrong thing? I guess it doesn't happen a lot, but it happened to me today. I got really frustrated and upset, but I feel like I stood my ground. Maybe I even tried to make that other person feel a little bit bad for not helping. I just don't get it ... if someone needs help, and I can help them - why wouldn't I?

Thanks for listening to me vent ... I'll reward you with some fun things I've been looking at on the internet:

Utah fire info - Maybe this is only interesting if you live in Utah and have ash on your car and smoke in your lungs ... but it's kind of neat to see where all the fires are, how contained they are, and what started them ...

I really like this store. I mostly want to buy this, but it is a bit pricey ... maybe I'll make my own.

My friend Brian is a really super awesome photographer. This summertime shot is one of my very favorites ... but check out his whole site, he's very talented.

Bored? Doodle here.

A lovely post with a great reminder.

How fun does this backyard movie night look?? Let's do it.

This might make you feel bad ... but it also might make you feel awesome.

And since it is the Sabbath, I'd like to share some really nice (random) church thoughts:

Alma 37:37
"Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day."

"This is a paradox of man: compared to God, man is nothing; yet we are everything to God. While against the backdrop of infinite creation we may appear to be nothing, we have a spark of eternal fire burning within our breast. We have the incomprehensible promise of exaltation—worlds without end—within our grasp. And it is God’s great desire to help us reach it." —Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Have a great Sunday!

a little personal

I don't really like to get too personal here ... but I'm going to today.

Do you ever have the worst day? Yesterday was the pits. It started out with me opening the mail the night before and getting our new insurance cards (yay!), but my little guy Wyatt was listed on the card. It's been a while since I had a good cry about things ... so I let myself. And Lucas let me (he's the best).

Then I had to drive to MONA. Don't get me wrong, I love the Impact Ranch, and I love Mona, but I don't love driving to Mona. Especially in the morning, to work. I used to work there, but it was when Lucas was working there. I'm just filling in for a cute gal that had a baby for a few weeks, so it's not bad. I just didn't feel like doing it. On the way down I thought I'd call Humana and get this insurance business straightened out. They had me explain my situation to 3 different people in 3 different departments, only to be told that my employer's HR department would have to call ... awesome.

So I got to the Ranch, did my thing for a couple of hours, realized that I need to write like 9 court reports for Ranch kids in the next few weeks, and drove back to Provo for more work. I emailed our HR lady (which really set my already crazy emotional levels off), then sat there at my desk for a good 30 minutes. I shuffled some papers around, checked my email a bunch, but didn't really check off anything on my list. So I left. I just went home.

Luckily when I got home, Brok was there to welcome me. I know it sounds crazy, but I think he gets it when I'm sad or upset. He didn't bug me to go to the park or anything, he just sat by me and watched Miami Ink until I fell asleep on the couch (I know, lazy). Don't worry, I slept for 2 hours. I can.

Then the other job. Usually I just love working in dispatch, but occasionally there's a shift I just dread. Some people are just hard to work with. This shift sucked. On the plus side, I did get a bunch of work done. So that's nice.

Luckily I have Lucas at home, waiting to put lotion on my sunburned back and kiss me goodnight. He is the best man.

Impact Ranch - Mona, UT

I know I'm a baby, this day doesn't sound nearly as awful as it is in my head. And don't worry, today has been much better.

Independence Day

My favorite things about Independence Day:

The Music





The Food

pulled pork - The Pioneer Woman

strawberries - Pro Craft Ideas

trifle - Fancy Frugal Life

spritzer - Apron Strings


The Flag

I love that the youth in our neighborhood put a flag on everyone's lawn, and I love what it means to me. I'm so grateful for those serving our country, and for those that have served in the past. I love my land, America.

Exciting News!

My dear friend, Blaine Cook Turk, has nominated me for an award.

If you haven't heard about it before, the Leibster is an award for inspiring bloggers with less than 200 followers. It’s a way of finding new blogs, new voices you may not have found otherwise. It works kind of like a chain letter ... if you get it, you pass it on to 5 blogs that you like, who can also pay it forward and we can all find new, awesome blogs to read!

The rules of the Liebster Award are:

1. Thank your Liebster Blog Award presenter on your blog
2. Link back to the blogger who presented the award to you
3. Copy and paste the blog award on your blog
4. Present the Liebster Blog Award to 5 blogs of 200 followers or less who you feel deserve to be noticed (see below)
5. Let them know they have been chosen by leaving a comment at their blog.

Here goes:

1. Blaine, I love you for doing this (and a million other reasons)... but don't you know you're way more inspiring than me?! Thank you, thank you.

2. If you have a chance, head over to Blaine's blog and check it out. Laughs and enjoyment guaranteed.

3.

4. I am nominating the following blogs:

#1 Mike & Steph -- Maybe my favorite blog, but I might be a little biased. In fact, she could have 200 followers for all I know, she's very popular. Steph is my sister, and has the cutest little punks in the world. Plus, she is always great to share tips and ideas she comes across. Love it.

#2 Brandon & Jillyn Larsen -- Jillyn is a great friend of mine, a CANCER SURVIVOR!, and pretty hilarious. Not to mention, great photographer and pretty darn great in general.

#3 Ben & Amber Walunas -- I went to high school with Amber and she always had the cutest style and personality. Nothing has changed. Even though she lives far away, I still like to check out her cute style (and she has the best dog ever!)

#4 Live My Life Project (by Ela) -- Ela is the SIL of my dear friend Lorien, and is becoming quite a great friend. Her blogs are fun and inspirational, and she's the founder of the Hen Movie Club!

#5 Ashley & Dizzle -- Someone I don't know in real life, but I love her blog. Ashley is a serious runner and does Crossfit! She has an awesome attitude about everything, and always has the cutest running outfits ... what an inspiration!

Hopefully you have a chance to check some of these out - they're great!

PS Thanks again Blaine! Love you!

father's day

Happy Father's Day to the best men I know:





{my father-in-law, Pat (and Paula!), my dad (and mom!), and my wonderful husband practicing with Steph's kids}

I'm so lucky to have these men in my life, plus so many others. Happy Father's Day!

Look at these things

I found this website: wittlebee - like Birchbox, but for kids clothes! Now I just need a kid ...
Wait, everyone has joined Birchbox, right? Click here if you haven't ...

Here is a super awesome talk from Elder Ballard about the importance of families.

Hilarious craigslist ad. Chances are you've probably seen it, but it's super funny ... those hipsters ....

This website - discounts on gift cards!

More kids clothes shopping ... like Kid to Kid but online ... has anyone tried this?

A list of Birthday freebies - My birthday is coming right up, $30 Benihana gift card? Yes please.

Speaking of my birthday ... we're contemplating a family vacation for that week, to here:



We should go, right? Even if it's only to hang out with those punks.
PS Thanks Ellen for the pics :)